Zombieholics Anonymous

Where there are never enough steps to help us all…




It’s funny when you consider the question because, where do you go? Do you have a plan in place for any catastrophic eventuality? Would you survive?

Each Wednesday I plan on giving a little insight into some of things I think about when my mind ponders events that really could mean the end of our comfortable lifestyles. There will be times you won’t agree with me, and that’s cool – you have a right to your own opinion and a right to survive any which way you can. Ideally, these are going to be the types of things I’m thinking about on a sub-conscious level and since I like to share sometimes, I’m going to share it with you all.

I hope you come back to read my tips and heck, if you want to know my thoughts on something, get in touch and let me know. It might be the topic of an upcoming tip!



Meeting: What Would You Do?

Hello, my name is Julianne and I’m a Zombieholic.

(There’s a pause as all the other Zombieholics in the room chant “Welcome Julianne”.)

So what would you do if the dead rose? Would you be paralyzed by fear or do you think your survival instincts would kick in? It’s an interesting question and one I’m sure many of you have asked yourselves.

What would I do? Well, I’d like to think I’d attempt to survive. I do have a plan that involves packing up and going north into the relatively uncivilized wilds of Northern Ontario. Let’s face it, the cities are going to become death traps fairly quickly as the epidemic takes hold and people to try to escape. Utter, freaking chaos will rule the streets. Sure, some will be able to get out, but many will not, That’s just fact. And it’s fact that I will be avoiding areas like that.

While my plan is simply to head north, I honestly have to wonder if I’d be able to survive. I do have some skills: I can fish, collect wood, start a fire, be observant of my surroundings; but how would I truly last out there? Would I get bored too quickly? Scare the crap out of myself? All of these things are highly possible…

At the moment, my supply of weapons is limited, though I do have a few connections on my survival team – provided I can get to them or they can get to me after it all goes down. While I’m not worried, I guess I am a little. I have a few items that I feel are important and if push came to shove, I’m relatively certain I’d be able to kill a zombie (I’d give it a good go, that’s for sure), but could I kill lots of them? They make it look so easy on television and in movies, but getting through a cranium isn’t actually all that easy…

So tell me, what would you do? Would what you be willing to do if it meant survival? Let me know if the comments section—there’s strength in numbers, but that’s something they’ll have too!

Julianne’s Monday Meeting: Why?

Hello, my name is Julianne and I am a Zombieholic.

(Hears the chorus of other Zombieholics in the room chanting “Welcome Julianne”)

I’ve been asked by a few people in my life why I love zombies so much. To me the answer seems simple, but I can see why others may question it. Look at the subject matter – decaying husks that were once the family and friends of people in the world. Who could love that? But I think one needs to look deeper.

Sure zombies gross and at times terrifying, but you need to look at what they once were, who they once were. Us. That’s terrifying and if you can’t see that, I think there might be something fundamentally wrong with you.

And I’m not taking that stance lightly either. Forget for a moment the different aspects of media we’ve been exposed to: books, movies, games, graphic novels, etc. Put yourself into a situation where you’re in a world with actual zombies.

Many say that will never happen, but what do we truly know? Perhaps it really is the future? So imagine yourself there, fighting tooth and nail for survival. Could you do it?

Could you kill a loved one if that meant your own survival?

I wrestle with that often. I look at my family and friends and wonder if the thoughts of who they once were would run through my mind as I stared them in their grotesque little undead faces. Would I pause? Would I hesitate in delivering the final blow? Would I leave one of them behind in order to escape?

I can’t answer those questions because it hasn’t happened yet and that’s what scares me. I’ve seen responses from people who maintain they’d have no issues dispatching those who they once loved, but I question that resolve. I’m not calling it a lie outright, they very well may be able to put a bullet through the head of what was once their child. What I am saying is that how can one truly know until they’re in that situation, holding a gun in one hand and trying to fend off a loved one with the other. Surely you can all agree there would be a war waging within each of us.

So that’s the thought I will leave you with today. Would you be able to do it?

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